V I T A L I T Y!!

Hello again,

I must say I have enjoyed reading all of the blogs. It is very exciting to hear how you all are doing!

So we are all leaving week 1 behind and have entered into Vitality of week 2!!

In the last two 40 programs this week had brought up many questions about the lifestyle I lived. I found myself asking whether I was truly eating the right foods? If I was listening to the aches and pains in my body at all? Did I acknowledge the fact that sometimes I simply did not want to take responsibility for the vital aspects of my life?

I love the week of Vitality because it had in the past cracked so many doors open I was afraid of looking at, and so I am curious to experience what doors will open this time around!

Although I am noticing already graduating into this week I have resistance that shows up towards my yoga practice! My resistance can quickly move into laziness and then quickly into stories on how and why I can not practice yoga today. My favorite excuse I have " I am too busy!" Do you have a favorite excuse?? Which one is it?

See you all tonight!

Namaste,

Aylin

Another post for Week 1 Excavation Questions

As Seka mentioned in her post….”it is time to dig”. I just finished spending an hour on this and lost my entire post when I went to review it. This is great practice in breathing and staying in the moment…

Question 1: How much am I taking responsibility to learn and grow from the experiences, both easy and difficult, that I have in my life?
I am usually good at taking on responsibility for not only everything I do but also everything in general – so my practice for this week is mainly to step back, observe, breathe, and not feel as if I have to take on EVERYTHING. Realizing that I can both be greatly involved in life and allow life to flow is very freeing and allows for energy to be preserved as needed.

Question 2: What are my beliefs about my body?
I have really been working with this question for a long time. In the past, I have been really hard on myself. Growing up I was in an environment where the body was evaluated daily and the way one perceived me often determined my self esteem for the day, week, month, etc. While today, I roll back and forth between hard and soft, I am working towards really appreciating my body. When I get out of the mind chatter and into a place of gratitude, thinking about all the ways my body serves me (my hands heal in massage and paramedic work, my legs provide power and strength for long distance runs and walks, my heart opens to the prospect of love and vulnerability even when I fall, my eyes take in the luxury of a full moon, and other beautiful sights, etc) then I can find some peace. The challenge is staying out of the mind chatter. It is often a “one step forward two steps back” dance but eventually the steps will be one forward and one back…and eventually, one forward and a half back…..or even none back….

Question 3: When in my life am I fully present?
I notice that I am truly really HERE, really present when I am running and in my body instead of my head – especially running at Wekiva State park, where I am surrounded by nature. I fall into noticing everything around me – especially the deer and other animals (wild turkeys, snakes, frogs, ladybugs, bees, funky bugs, etc) I am peaceful and relaxed, and my senses are more alive. I notice that I also find presence when I am working on a client (massage) and most of the time I teach a cycling or yoga class. Before I step into these arenas, I always take a moment to thank God for my skills and abilities. When I do this, I never feel tired or overwhelmed in my work and I remain fully focused throughout the process. When I do not take a moment to “connect”, I sometimes feel scattered and notice my mind wandering.

Question 4: Where in my life am I hiding?
I think where I most hide is in covering myself with a giant veil of “I am STRONG” and “I don’t need anyone’s help”. I have spent so long wanting to please everyone, that it is easy to forget what I preach: “together we have the ability to be more than either one of us alone”. UNITY – Responsibility is not too much of an issue for me but asking for help and even more importantly, feeling worthy of receiving help have been issues for me. I am seeing this and ready to move beyond.

Question 5: Where am I flirting with disaster?
At first, this seems tough to answer but then I peel only one layer back and see….the answers staring right back at me. Again, in wanting approval from others, especially men, in my past, I have allowed myself to expend energy in relationships (both personal and work) that do not serve me, and even more, that are vampire-like in that they disempower me and take my energy. I have seen this recently and was able to step out of this mode. The better option is not to be in this space but while I am, I will continue to check in and notice if I am in a place that is serving me or taking from me, so that I can change this pattern. For good.

Week One Excavation Questions

Week One Excavation Questions

Day 6: Balance of Energy

From: sekayoga.wordpress.com

So today, I got my yoga practice in! Yay!!!! I work nights on the weekends, and I worked today at the MStore, so I have a fine balance of sleep and waking that I have to preserve. The preservation of energy has been my excuse to not meditate. Not good. As I am readying myself for another night of workin, I am quickly jotting my thoughts for you. Tomorrow is Sunday Funday. My day to BE. I have some goodies to share....more thoughts and process to come.
Take care lovely readers.
Much love.

Day 5: Fail

From: sekayoga.wordpress.com

Um...so I didn't get to my post for Thursday, seeing as it is Friday. Working days and nights seems to hinder the creative (and meditative) process. More to come....


(How are you doing?)

Day 4: Presence

From: sekayoga.wordpress.com

Be Present.
What does that mean for you?
For me, it means to be fully in the moment, to be awake to what is happening in my life at any given moment; not thinking about the future, not thinking about the past, but being here and now. This isn't always easy...my mind takes me all over the place and back again.

So the 40 Days to Personal Revolution is a four part program: daily yoga practice, diet insight and plan, meditation, ad excavation questions. Week One is "Come into Your Body" and the theme is Presence.

I am struggling today.... I work as a bartender/cocktail waitress as well as in a yoga boutique, so my balance of energy is very precarious. Last night I worked until 2:30 a.m. and today I am at work at 9:00am. I have tiredness. Perhaps the fatigue will help with my presence. I hope to get to the point where I can publish these notes at the end of the day that they represent. blah blah....I need some sleepy time.

Day 3: Laws 1 & 2

From: sekayoga.wordpress.com

Yesterday was my mother's birthday; she is 52 years young. It was like any other day with the family, except there was more attention to each person in the family. This was the first time, I can recall that we didn't turn the television on, but rather we were all together, making dinner and memories together.

My visit home reminded me of these fundamental laws. The first and second Laws of Transformation are 1: Seek the Truth, and 2: Be Willing to Come Apart, although, I think that the order should be flipped. The past three months have shown me what it means to come apart. To come apart is to lose control of things. It's all about control.

I've had a very tight handle on things in my life. I am a planner, a doer, an achiever. I have had to learn to let go of the reigns and let the flow take me where I am supposed to go. This became clear to me, during my teacher certification program at MBody Yoga, but became very evident when, what I will call, my series of unfortunate events began to hit. 1. My roommate moved out to be with the love of his life. 2. I was terminated from the best job I have ever had. 3. My car insurance dropped me. 4. I got a speeding ticket. In other words, the hits just kept coming and I kept taking them. I had no control. I was scared.

Law 2: Be Willing to Come Apart. I couldn't come any more apart (well....I could); I know that all this is happening for a reason. I trust that the universe is making space for something big...I mean making BIG space for something HUGE! "The only time we ever really know the truth of life is when the rug has been pulled out from underneath us." So there I was, standing on the bare cold floor minus my rug, when I realized the truth (enter Law 1: Seek the Truth).

The truth of life is love. I found out who in my life truly loved and cared for me when I was most vulnerable. It was the most humbling thing for me to accept help and show weakness, but I put trust in the relationships that I have. I was surprised who stood up for me, besides my mom and stepdad who are always behind me, one particular person stood up for me and helped me the most. The surprise is in the fact that this person has been so difficult to contact, that I would say he was not in my life, but he has always kept a finger on my pulse, even from afar and he stepped up when I needed him the most. I am grateful. I am humbled. I am loved. And that is the truth.

Mom said this was her best birthday ever. I agree.

PS. Meditation Mission: I haven't meditated in the evening the past two nights...I need to make time before I crash into my pillow.

Day 2: My meditation Mission

From: sekayoga.wordpress.com



Meditation. A key part of the 40 days to Personal Revolution is establishing a personal meditation practice. This is my biggest challenge...wait, this is my biggest opportunity. Even writing about meditation makes me want to find distraction (hence the late entry).

So what is meditation? Google "meditation" and you get 32, 500 entries in 0.24 seconds. Merriam-Webster's Online Dictionary defines "meditate" as:
1: to engage in contemplation or reflection
2: to engage in mental exercise (as concentration on one's breathing or repetition of a mantra) for the purpose of reaching a heightened level of spiritual awareness

I identify with the second definition most, at least that is what I understand meditation to be through this process. Through the 40 days, it is not about reflection or contemplating a topic, such as a daily devotional, but rather a process of awareness. Becoming aware of the thoughts that float in and out of my mind at any moment. Being able to sit in stillness and then to not get attached to the thoughts that distract my mind, that is my goal.

So yada yada, we know what meditation is, HOW do I meditate? I do as I was taught at the Cultivating Peace Workshop at MBody Yoga. First it is best to meditate first thing in the morning and last thing at night. A anagram my teacher taught me is RPM: Rise, Pee, Meditate. For me, it is RFPM: Rise, Feed (cats), Pee, Meditate. Find a quiet place in your house, like your extra bedroom that you can't seem to rent out. Find some blankets or pillows to sit on. It is important to keep your hips higher than your knees so that your legs don't fall asleep. If sitting on the floor is difficult you can sit in a chair. Whatever seated pose is best for you, take it, just be sure to be upright, since lying down lends itself to napping. This is not svasana or nap time, it is time to be present.
Now, bring your hands together so that your fingers touch one another. Close your eyes. Breathe. And begin to watch your mind, your thoughts as they come in and out of your awareness. If you find yourself following a thought tangent, getting pulled away from center, come back to your hands. Focus on your center.

Meditation is like exercise a muscle. It takes time to be able to sit and be still. Thanks to our society, we are trained to go go go all the time, but the truth is the truth is in the stillness.
Be still and know.

Day 1: 40 Days to Personal Revolution

From: sekayoga.wordpress.com

I've heard time and time again, "Be careful what you wish for." Today, I was listening to NPR, and there was a story about a young woman who decided to take the advice of Seventeen Magazine for an entire month and to blog about it. While her journey is completely irrelevant to what I am about to share, it did generate a thought in my mind. This blog has been sitting idle for well over a year, and while I have received positive feedback about my writing, I have lacked the inspiration to write daily. And seeing that successful blogs are updated at least once daily, I thought to myself (here's the wish)-I wish I had something like a journey or quest or challenge to document on my blog.

Well!
Tonight, I made a personal recommitment to practicing yoga again. I lost my job, got depressed, fell away from practicing...blah blah blah. So tonight, I came back to yoga. Awesome.

Well...
Be careful what you ask for. I went into yoga just for the practice, but I left signed up for the 40 Days to Personal Revolution at MBody Yoga. So here is my quest: I will document my challenges, breakthroughs, learnings, food intake, meditations, and yoga practices for the next 40 days.

The best thing about this is that is actually coincides with another little challenge I have with my boyfriend. We wagered a champagne sailboat picnic and a Sunday Brunch at Casa Monica (I'm winning the sailboat picnic...he only thinks he will be dining at Casa Monica). The person who loses the most body fat percentage by August 1st (which happens to be 40 days from now) wins said wager.

Let the Revolution begin!!!

Balance

Since I know I'm going to indulge significantly at the Sharks game tonight (think yuengling and a brat or two), lunch was a big bowl of grapes and strawberries.

Balance :-)

I missed having the time for some of my other workouts this week, but 5 straight days of yoga felt good for the mind and body! I'm taking today off, and am back at it tomorrow morning at Eddie's class.

Hope everyone enjoys the weekend

Andy

Checkin' In

I've been following the program pretty well. I found it hard at the beginning of the week to fit everything in. So that was my first big clue that I need to slow down--it's only a five minute meditation. Crazy to think I don't have five minutes in the morning and another five in the evening. I have been going to practice but was struggling at times to make it through. Well I know why--I found out today that I have mono. And NO! I'm not contagious at all. It's way past the contagious stage but still leaves me very, very tired. I've been pushing through as best as I can. But now that I have a diagnosis, doctor says I'm not supposed to do anything strenuous at all for two weeks. Two weeks! I have a feeling I will be in childs pose quite a bit as I don't think I'm able to just not go to practice. This has me a bit frustrated, annoyed but I'm going to do everything else and practice at the level I can.

Week One - Checking In

Hi All -

This has been an interesting week for me — lots of questions are coming up. Like a lot of you that I’ve talked to, the most difficult thing to do this week has been to sit still for five minutes in the mornings and evenings. The monkey in my mind is on an adrenaline surge, I think — bouncing all over the place. I’m having faith that this condition will pass with practice!

The eating awareness has been interesting, too. Writing everything down is no change for me — I’ve been doing that for awhile now — but I’ve also been tracking calories for quite awhile and I find myself wondering if that kind of diet-police mentality doesn’t go against the spirit of this exercise. I’ve also really started to view “diet” foods in a different light and have been steering clear of those. Ironically, I’ve actually ended up eating fewer calories every day in spite of that but I think that’s due to being so busy cramming in a yoga practice every day. My best friend and I joke that our gravestones are going to say “She often mistook boredom for hunger” and that problem has been alleviated by having so much more to do.

My favorite thing this week has been my time on the mat. It’s been a little challenging to schedule the rest of my life so I can make it to the studio but I’ve gotten so much satisfaction out of it that it’s definitely been worth it. I think I owe my son an extra trip to the pool (and maybe a movie) over the weekend in exchange for his patience with my absence though!

See you all on Monday night!

Thursday

Hey ya'll,

so far so good this week but I did eat a brownie today and it tasted so good but after about an hour I had the biggest belly ache!!! so ah no more brownies!!!!! :)~

I am behind on my reading and plan to catch up this weekend. Seek the Truth has been ringing big time in my head and I plan on seeking my truth.

I hope you all are having a great week and i'll see you at the studio!!!

Namaste!

K.

Hello all, I did my meditation today, not a great one, but I did it. I got 2 blocks for home so I could sit in a position that didn't make me go numb, so yea for that.
I'm also paying attention to my foods, I eat pretty healthy most of the time anyway, but noticing when something doesn't serve me well, or agree with me.
Greg

week one -diet

I started paying attention to how I nourish my body. I do make a conscious effort to stay away from processed foods - like those meals in a box. I noticed I tend to eat foods depending on the seasons. For instance, during the summer months I consume sweet, water-based refreshing fruits and vegetables. In colder months, hearty-heavy stews or pot roast, warm fruit pies, etc.

Paying closer attention to the foods I eat and how my body reacts.

PRESENCE TODAY

Buenos Dias Everyone!

I hope you are all doing well with your practice & meditation. . . I have fallen a bit behind with my reading but plan on catching up today :)

PRESENCE- I have been running around with too much to do this week! TODAY I AM READY TO SLOW DOWN AND BE PRESENT in my day, in my job, in my relationships and take a breath (sigh).

My meditation this morning was difficult, I was ready for it to be over- so I think I will try that again in a few minutes. . .

It is a NEW DAY :)

Good morning 40 Day Bloggers!

Awesome meeting last night :) I hope you all had a good rest and are as excited as I am to get going with this revolution!

I am sitting here procrastinating on doing my meditation. . . Lots of things to do before I get out of my house today but I WILL MEDITATE for 5 minutes once I get all my shit done. Busy, busy bee!

Well, I hope to see all of you tonight for my class at Southside.

Have a great day!